First page of my book?

Friday, 9 January 2015


So guys, I hope you're all amazing, if not smile, and hopefully you should now feel like it. 
You probably know by now this book I keep mumbling on about, and about 83,000 words down line, I've finished it and I've found myself almost lost, what do I do now?
I'm hoping his one day be on a book shelf (one can dream right?) 

The only unfortunate thing about writing is, it's hard to tell weather the book is good or not, I wish I could send it so someone unbiased and have them read it, but ironically enough I would be so scared to hear that it might be awful, especially after the work I've put into it, and how connected I am with the characters. 

Another tricky thing is that everyone has different taste, and different audiences, I know my audience is definitely young adults, but I hope it can stretch to different audiences too. Essentially I need a proof reader, as my spelling and grammar, does lacks quite majorly! How ironic for a wannabe writer right?

I thought I would post my first page of my book, and see what you guys think. Especially as many of you guys asking to read it, and the chances of it ever becoming a real book, is something that I don't have the power to do, and also something that might be pretty unlikely.

 The first page happens to be the prologue; I won't lie to you it doesn't give that much away to the books plot, but I guess the aim is to get you interested. If the first page doesn't want to make you read more, you're probably doing something wrong, so I guess I'll test it out? I'd love to hear your thoughts, and opinions, and maybe as I keep checking through the book for mistakes, I can post more of the book on here? 
Like I said this might be utter rubbish, I can't tell. I always think honesty is scary, but the better policy, so go ahead and be truthful! Then I can improve and make my story the best it can be.

 Prologue
The stupid thing about change is that you think you want it, you think you need it in order for life to get better, but that couldn’t be more wrong. What we don’t realise is that it makes things worse; change happens and then we’re left realising how lucky we were beforehand. That's the thing about life too, we don’t realise how good we had it until it’s gone.

I’m really angry, you know? I know that’s not a surprising emotion in a situation like this, but it’s not fear, upset, despair, or confusion. It’s just the deafening anger I can feel. This isn’t even the way it’s supposed to be. I’ve been told it didn’t happen this way in movies, books, even TV shows. Thats because they weren’t real, but we’re living life, which unfortunately is. A life where one bad thing balances on the other, where time is a luxury you don’t believe you deserve. I don’t even know why I call it life

I remember when I thought my main problem was my appearance, as I sat in my tiny room  staring in the mirror, analysing my many imperfections. I also hated the way I was treated, the rules and regulations that were thrusted in my face. I now realise how pathetic I was, I mean I’d give anything to go back to those little problems

I’m still sitting on the ground; my whole focus staring at her bright red boots as they fall elegantly on the floor,  the laces sprayed out in waved lines, as they wrestle within the rest of the rubbled items.

I will have to accept what’s happened, because in this life you have no choice but to accept things you have no control over.


So that's it, comment down below or tweet me, while I figure out what I do now with my life, considering that my fun hobby has finished.

Speak soon

-A, x 

19 comments:

  1. I really enjoyed reading it, altough as you said the prologue doesn't reveal the plot... If you were to post the book here, I'd defo read it!! xx

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    1. Ah thank you! I highly doubt I'd ever post the whole book, but maybe a few chapters! Thanks for the feedback!
      -A,x

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  2. I genuinely think that it's a really great prologue! It leaves you wondering what the plot is, I'm really curious and now I want to read the whole thing. As for spelling and grammar I didn't notice any mistakes at all. It's really really good, well done Amelia! :)

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    1. Ah thank you so much! That's the kind of thing I wanted to get out of the prologue, rather than jump starting straight into the first chapter! Merci!!!
      -A,x

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  3. I think that the second paragraph is a much better hook? As a reader I automatically start wondering why you're angry/what happened to make you so angry and so on. I'd maybe suggest moving the first paragraph towards the end? I'm not sure but that second paragraph is a great attention getter. Great job- I can't wait to read the rest!!!!!

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    1. Ah thank you so much! That's really interesting! Maybe I could swap them around? What does everyone else think? Really helpful idea though!
      -A,x

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  4. I honestly think this is an incredible book opening! As a reader I would like to now know why and how she might feel this way! I have so many questions about the plot! Also I think it's beautifully written and worth of something for sure! After seeing your determination and connection with the story via snapchat I have a feeling the storyline is going to be great and full of powerful emotion. Trying to get to and go through the publishing stage of book (as well as everything that must be done before that) I imagine must be a very scary process but I believe with the correct guidance and support this story could get somewhere! And if it were to ever hit the shelves of course I would purchase it! You have a real talent Amelia, don't ever doubt yourself :) thank you for posting this and please do consider posting more of the book on here - Rachel x

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    1. This is such a lovely comment! WOW! Thanks so much!
      -A,x

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  5. I agree with the above comment that explains that the second paragraph should be the opening. The use of the question especially enables the reader to relate to the speaker immediately and the ambiguity makes them want to read further. I also think you should consider adding a semicolon to the following sentence 'Thats because they weren’t real, but we’re living life, which unfortunately is' as the placement of commas isn't quite right. Perhaps like 'Thats because they weren't real; but we're living life, which unfortunately is'. Also in the introduction to the book the spelling is 'whether' and I believe you've accidentally put 'weather' instead. Hope this has been useful, if you need anymore help feel free to give me a cheeky message. Also wanted to point out that what you've accomplished is amazing and I hope I could one day write a book too!

    Much love,
    Jasmin, 18, Surrey

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    1. Thank you! Maybe I will change them around! Thanks also for correcting me on my grammar mistakes! Much appreciated!
      -A,x

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  6. First of all, it's so inspirational to hear that you've written a book, I plan to one day too :) Loved the prologue, very interesting and I want to hear what happens next desperately! Only thing would be maybe switching out some of the overused adjectives for more "scholarly" sounding ones? I'm a bit of a word nut so that's just my personal opinion haha. Also maybe cutting out all unneccessary words and sentences - again a minor thing. Good on you! I would love to read the book one day! If it's any consolation, I would buy it if it were published ;) I stumbled across a website a while ago which I found really helpful as a writer: www.goinswriter.com . He has a whole bunch of info on self-publishing and publishing in general, as well as writing tips. Have fun! I love reading your blog and you are definitely a talented writer - you'll go far!

    Love Madison xo

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  7. Thanks for your advice, I will check out the website now!
    Thank you so much
    -A,x

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  8. This really is very well-written - well done Amelia! I hope you achieve your dream!

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  9. This is amazingly well written and I can not wait to read the rest. I really enjoy reading your blog and watching your YouTube videos. You are a really talented writer and you will definitely go far in life. :-)

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  10. Hi Amelia :) What you have is an intriguing start - one that will undoubtedly draw people in. If you are ever in need of a Beta Reader before you send your work into someone, I'd love to help. As a Beta Reader, I'm a strong editor and I won't crush any feelings ;) Anyhow, I wish you luck in your journey. It's rare for someone as young as you to have have finished a book, especially one that sounds so good. I wish you luck in your future writing endeavours!

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  11. It's so good! I want to know what happens next! I'm a BIG reader, and I love your style of writing. :)

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  12. Hi Amelia !!
    I loved it ! now I want to read all your book haha !!
    Really, I'm sure it will be published one day, and I will be the first to buy it !

    Love xxxx (from a french viewer) :P

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  13. It's amazing! I want to read on, want to know what happens next! It's just awesome!:)
    xx from Paola (from Germany) ♡☆

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    1. I just found out that you can read a part of your book so I'm only reading it now:( I would've loved to read it sooner ^^ ;)

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